mask

behind that thick paint on a clown's face...
hides a story of bitterness and sorrow...
which is not known to the world...

when the paint is on...
its time to cover all sorrow and bitterness...
its time to bring laughther into the life of others...
but when the paint is remove...
who shall bring joy to their life?

i am tired...
tired of everything..

when you think you have everything... you actually have nothing...
it looks like i've got all the things i wan... but actually i have none..
whats the point of having so many things when you dun have the basics to keep you moving...

i have very important things in my life missing...
happiness
love

i have lost happiness a long time ago... and i still cannot find them...
love... i did not lost love... how can you lost something when you did not even own it in the first place... for 19 yrs of my life... i never owned love...

i chose not to believe that the most important things that keep me going are all gone...
i kept dreaming of the impossible...
now i have come to understand...
do not dream when you know it will never come true... it will only make life miserable...
how to dream... when you have nothing...
i know it shall never come back and i would never own such thing...

i am no cinderella... and my life is no fairytale...
but only a empty shell...

i shall stop dreaming...
not anymore...

now i finally understand

now i finally understand...

it took me so many years to understand something so simple...
don't dream when you know it will never happen... it will only make you miserable...

for so many years in my live i have been dreaming... dreaming of the impossible...
if only i had knew...
maybe i would no be so miserable...

now i know... a can never have a cinderella's life...

auntie who is in love with korean drama...

i am that auntie...
have been watching korean drama these few days...
laughing and crying as the story goes on...
haha... cannot believe i will like korean drama...
there are so many show i want to watch espcially by Lee Dong Gun...
haha...
he so ke ai...
been watching him act in the drama "Xing Niang 18 Siu"
yah... TV got show before one... but missed it... so went to rent the vcd to watch and now i have been so addicted to him, the actress and the show... super cute lo... haa...
no time to blog... watch show... and Major Project is starting to kick off... so i think i will have lesser time to watch my drama...

*gosh! i feel like a 50 year old o-ba-sang... who like korean drama... oh! winter sonata... here i come... wait for me!!... jewel in the palace... haha*

SIAO

more MVs

can you believe it... 4 posts in a day... WHAO! record breaking...
and whats more... all are videos...

1. Fan Yi Chen - Love Story

Fan Yi Chen looks different from the past...
more of the bad boy look liao... and more fit... haha

2. Tanya - Beautiful Love

Love's beautiful...
This song is written by the F.I.R's guitarist ah qin
and is for F.I.R de Faye... they are an item...
what a match make in heaven...

3. Tanya - Zhang Yan Fa

her songs in this album is nice...
better den her previous genre of music...

4. Fan Yi Chen - Shuo Bu Chu De Wen Rou

another Fan Yi Chen's Song...
the MV is the Xing Ping Guo Le Yuan trailer...
the story line looks like the same one...
rich boy feel in love with poor pretty girl...
but den dunno for what they break up...
ha...i can be director

5. Tong En - Yi Xia Xia

tong en... nice song...


6. F.I.R - Fei Xing Bu Luo

FIR is back... with their new song!! NICE

Touching Mvs

was watching MVs in Youtube when i found some MVs which never fail to touch my heart and make me tear... all have something in common... everlasting love..

1. Lin Jun Jie - Hui You Na Me Yi Tian



2. S.H.E - Wo Ai Ni

Singapore Fireworks Festival - New Caledonia

my third video of Singapore Fireworks Festival... and also the video that i am the most pleased with...


Very nice...

Rihanna - Unfaithful

i feel in love with this song...

Rihanna - Unfaithful



Story of my life Searching for the right
But it keeps avoiding me
Sorrow in my soul
cause it seems that wrong
really loves my company

He's more than a man
and this is more than love
the reason that the sky is blue
the clouds are rolling in
because I'm gone again
and to him I just can't be true

and I know that he knows I'm unfaithful
and it kills him inside
to know that I am happy with some other guy
I can see him dying

I don't wanna do this anymore
I don't wanna be the reason why
Everytime I walk out the door
I see him die a little more inside
I don't wanna hurt him anymore
I don't wanna take away his life
I don't wanna be... a murderer

I feel it in the air
as I'm doing my hair
preparing for another day
A kiss up on my cheek
reluctantly
as if I'm gonna be out late
I say I won't be long
Just hanging with the girls
A lie I didn't have to tell
Because we both know
where I'm about to go
and we know it very well

cause I know that he knows I'm unfaithful
and it kills him inside
to know that I am happy with some other guy
I can see him dying

I don't wanna do this anymore
I don't wanna be the reason why
Everytime I walk out the door
I see him die a little more inside
I don't wanna hurt him anymore
I don't wanna take away his life I don't wanna be...
a murderer

Our Love, his trust
I might as well take a gun and put it to his head
and Get it over with
I don't wanna do this
Anymore ooohh(anymore)

I don't wanna do this anymore
I don't wanna be the reason why
Everytime I walk out the door
I see him die a little more inside
I don't wanna hurt him anymore
I don't wanna take away his life
I don't wanna be... a murderer (a murderer)

No no no

Yeah yeah yeah

fun quiz... (cont)

again... something which i find interesting and quite true

You Are An ESFP

The Performer You are a natural performer and happiest when you're entertaining others. A great friend, you are generous, fun-loving and optimistic. You love to laugh - and you like almost all people equally. You accept life as it is, and you do your best to make each day fantastic. You would make a good actor, designer, or counselor.

What's Your Personality Type?

hmm... you will see me on the next star awards...

Your Chances of Being a Multimillionaire: 48%

You have a decent shot at being a multimillionaire. Surprised? You're confident and a hard worker. Keep it up!

Will You Be a Multimillionaire?

damn it!!

You Are Sunset

Even though you still may be young, you already feel like you've accomplished a lot in life. And you feel free to pave your own path now, and you're not even sure where it will take you. Maybe you'll pursue higher education in a subject you enjoy - or travel the world for a few years. Either way, you approach life with a relaxed, open attitude. And that will take you far!

What Time Of Day Are You?

hmm... true...

You Are 10% Boyish and 90% Girlish

Even if you're not a girl, you're very feminine. You're in touch with your feelings, and your heart rules you. A bit of a emotional roller coaster, one moment you're up and the next you're down. But no matter what, you try to be as cute and perky as possible.

How Boyish or Girlish Are You?

i like this...

How You Are In Love

You fall in love quickly and easily. And very often. You tend to give more than take in relationships. You tend to get very attached when you're with someone. You want to see your love all the time. You love your partner unconditionally and don't try to make them change. You are fickle and tend to fall out of love easily. You bounce from romance to romance.

How Are You In Love?

no lehs... not true... to some extend.. the first and last paragraph not true lo

Your Ideal Relationship is Marriage

You've dated enough to know what you want. And that's marriage - with the right person. You're serious about settling down some time soon. Even if you haven't met the person you want to get hitched to!

What's Your Ideal Relationship?

true true true true... very true!!

The Keys to Your Heart

You are attracted to those who are unbridled, untrammeled, and free. In love, you feel the most alive when your lover is creative and never lets you feel bored. You'd like to your lover to think you are optimistic and happy. You would be forced to break up with someone who was ruthless, cold-blooded, and sarcastic. Your ideal relationship is open. Both of you can talk about everything... no secrets. Your risk of cheating is zero. You care about society and morality. You would never break a commitment. You think of marriage as something that will confine you. You are afraid of marriage. In this moment, you think of love as something you don't need. You just feel like flirting around and playing right now.

What Are The Keys To Your Heart?

true true true true... TRUE!!!

You're an Passionate Kisser

For you, kissing is about all about following your urges If someone's hot, you'll go in for the kiss - end of story You can keep any relationship hot with your steamy kisses A total spark plug - your kisses are bound to get you in trouble

What Kind of Kisser Are You?

muHahA

Your Love Style is Agape

You are a caring, kind, and selfless partner. Unsurprisingly, your love style is the most rare. You are willing to sacrfice your world for your sweetie. Except it doesn't really feel like sacrifice to you. For you, nothing feels better than giving to the one you love.

What's Your Love Style?

u heard that... i am caring... haha... true...

Your Element Is Water

A bit of a contradiction, you can seem both lighthearted and serious. That's because you're good at going with the flow - but you also are deep. Highly intuitive, you tune in to people's emotions and moods easily. You are able to tap into deep emotional connections and connect with others. You prefer a smooth, harmonious life - but you can navigate your way around waves. You have a knack for getting people to get along and making life a little more peaceful.

What's Your Element?
hmm...

to be cont. ...

fun quiz (cont.)

Your Love Life Secrets Are

Looking back on your life, you will have a few true loves. Although you may have been hurt before, you tend to bring very little scars into new relationships. It's important to you that your lover is very attractive. You like to have someone to show off. In fights, you are able to walk away and calm down. You are able to weather the storm. You have a hard time ending relationships, even if the other person says it's over.

Your Love Life Secrets, Revealed

Slow and Steady

Your friends see you as painstaking and fussy. They see you as very cautious, extremely careful, a slow and steady plodder. It'd really surprise them if you ever did something impulsively or on the spur of the moment. They expect you to examine everything carefully from every angle and then usually decide against it.

How Do People See You?

do you see me this way?

fun quizzes

You are 80% Aries

How Aries Are You?

Very Aries... i am

You Are 20% Obsessive

You're less prone to obsessive thoughts than the rest of the world... While you do get hung up from time to time, you're excellent at clearing your mind.

How Obsessive Are You?

hmm...

Your True Love Is a Scorpio

Why you'll love a Scorpio: Strong and sexy, Scorpio will overpower you into falling in love (before you even realize it!). You'll love being swept away by Scorpio - into a world of insane passion. Why a Scorpio will love you: You don't mind letting your Scorpio take the reigns, as long as you know you're truly cared for. Loyal and devoted, you would never do anything to set off insanely jealous Scorpio.

What Sign Is Your True Love?

!!!... jer is a scorpio... ha... coincidental or fated

You Are Rain

You can be warm and sexy. Or cold and unwelcoming. Either way, you slowly bring out the beauty around you. You are best known for: your touch Your dominant state: changing

What Type of Weather Are You?

i love rain

losta things... in short

there are lots of things to tell...

firstly... MY ATTACHMENT IS OVER...!!
but i am going back to the office to work in part time basis... until end aug...

seondly... i am happy... cos we finally talked online for so so long... an hr plus i think... hahhaa i manage to ask the ques!! "how do u feel about me?" and guess wad he say....

me: dun tell u... *hrmpt* ... guess

but i think i am still a step away from my dream...

thirdly... i am going on a holi... dunno where yet... place is still not confirmed...

finally... i think i like my life now... and i am on diet! hahaha.. wish me luck...

*what a short summary of things i want to say*